The epidemic of stress in the UK and the quiet habit that's keeping us there

According to a recent article in The Guardian, more than 5 million people in the UK are experiencing chronic stress. You may have felt it in your own body: the tight chest, the sunday night dread, the “I just need to get through this week” mindset that somehow never ends.

But here's the thing, that figure didn't shock me. What shocks me is how many people struggle silently. What shocks me is how it still seems so easy for us to ignore our needs, despite the constant weight we are carrying around. So why is that?

Somewhere along the way, we were taught that our value lies in being useful, productive, low-maintenance and emotionally manageable. Especially for women and carers, the conditioning runs deep:

• Put others first

• Keep going no matter what

• Rest is a reward, not a right

  
  

So even when our bodies scream “slow down” we override it. Why? Because guilt is louder than intuition. So what does this look like for our everyday?

Our world is ever-growing, we are feeling busier than ever because of the constant notifications, constant comparison and 24/7 performance pressure. It's no wonder we are tired. We wake up and make decisions about what to wear, what face products to use, what to eat, what we need to plan for the end of the day, what we need to do in work, what we need to say to people in work, we think about our relationships, our friends and relatives, our children. We say "I'll rest when I finish this", "It's not that bad", "other people have it worse". We ignore our needs and in doing so we lose access to our joy, our presence.

Self-neglect doesn't look dramatic, it looks like:

• Saying yes when you want to say no

• Eating lunch at your laptop everyday

• Never asking, "what do I need today?"

But if we become aware of these silent habits, the quiet voices of conditioning, we can start to gently shift some of the weight out of our body and minds. Here are 3 simple ways you can start to respond to your stress differently:

• Place your hand on your chest and ask yourself "what do I need right now?" - Use the moment to bring your focus to your body, what can you hear around your? What can you smell? How does your clothing feel on your body? What does it feel like in your hands?

• Create a boundary with your phone - Don't take it into the bathroom with you, leave it in the living room whilst you're cooking, use an alarm clock instead of your phone so that it isn't the first thing you're looking at every morning

• Check in with yourself more regularly - name what you're feeling out loud, no fixing, just noticing - write it down if it helps to explore and notice any patterns throughout the month

Because here's what I know - the world may not slow down, but you can choose to relate to your stress differently. And that one choice, repeated gently over time, may just change everything.

If you feel like you're desperatly trying to hold it all together but quietly falling apart, trust me you're not alone. I'm here to hold space for you. To listen to your unspoken needs without judgement. You can find out more about how to book in a session with me here. I would also like to invite you to sign up to my email subscription, as I'm currently working on something very exciting launching soon that'll offer you free support and techniques personalised to what you'd like help with.

With compassion,

Lucy

**References - The Guardian article